Be In Love With Your Life | Health, Love & Fire

Be In Love With Your Life

Friday, March 14, 2014

After seeing several posts yesterday about Self Love, I decided today was the day to post something a little deeper. I had been contemplating sharing things I’m too afraid to publish or why I’m my worst critic for a while now, and the amazing ladies I tune in to every morning truly inspired me this week! So here’s a little compellation of things I’m either scared of or worry about sharing and why I should be in love with my own life.


I look at this picture and think, I look chubby, why am I squinting, I shouldn't share this! But here I am! 


I may be one of the most competitive people ever – If you’ve ever played a board game or gone bowling with me, I’m sorry. Yes I am unfortunately one of those people who gets super upset, will stop talking, and gets really irritated and uncomfortable when I’m not winning. I blame it on my father and the fact that even as a 2 year old, he wouldn’t let me win at Candy Land because “I had to learn sometime”. Thanks Dad! I swear I’m getting better, and put a conscious effort in to my behavior when I’m around others, but all bets are off when I’m playing Monopoly with my family! That’s when shit gets real!

I constantly stress about how I look – I know I’m my own worst critic and I truly put myself down more times a day than I could count. Reading Whitney and Beverly’s posts yesterday about Project Self-Love, I know I need to start being my own biggest fan instead of biggest critic. It takes me at least twenty minutes to get dressed in the morning – I consider it a success if I wear the second outfit I put on. I stare in to my closet, which houses way more clothes than anyone ever needs and I still can’t find something that I like on me. I’ve struggled with my weight for the last few years and shed many tears worrying about how I look and how I feel. I’m terrified to think about getting pregnant and getting even bigger.

I really don’t like working – Sure, most people don’t enjoy work, that’s why they call it work, but I seriously sit here at my desk a dozen times a day and day dream of laying by a pool with a margarita in my hand reading a book and getting a sun tan every day of my life! It’s frustrating because I feel like I am working just to pay off my college education.

Most people in my everyday life don’t know about this blog – I’m scared of rejection, scared of people actually knowing some of my deeper thoughts.

I’m an introvert most of the time who really wants to be an extrovert – I love dancing in front of people, making people laugh, and being the goofy one in a group, but hold myself back because I’m afraid of what other’s might think. I watch other people who exude such confidence and sass and I dream of being able to do that!

I dream of this blog becoming something so much bigger - I seriously idolize people like Whitney  and Erin and the amazing network and group of people they touch every day. I'm a really impatient person and want to see this little space grow and grow and grow, but I'm working on finding my place and figuring this all out. I'm still trying to figure out my niche, or be okay with just writing "Me" and hopefully other's will enjoy that. 

I'm a people pleaser - I'm constantly worrying about what other's think, if other's are happy, if other people like me . . . gosh Libby, cut it out. I think that's part of where my fear of growing this little blog come from. I want people to want to come here, to enjoy what I write, and to like following along. 


I have so many dreams but truly no clue what I want - When it comes to my future, I'm a planner. I want to have everything in order, planned out, a checklist made, and no possible flaws. Well, that just isn't reality now is it! As I sit here with a college degree, extra certifications, and a full time job, I'm still like dreaming about something more. What have I considered, photography, event planning, etsy shop, blogging . . . and way to many other things! I have a problem picking something and staying with it, because I like change almost as much as I like redecorating and rearranging my furniture, which if you've ever lived with me you'd know is a lot! 




Well there's a little insight in to the millions of thoughts, fears and questions that run through my head every day. Hopefully you'll find some commonalities in yourself and like me, work to embrace your true passions and the wonderful person each of us is! I think we can all use a little reminder of the great traits each of us possess. 


5 comments :

  1. I love this post :) Your honest words are so refreshing! Have you ever heard of the game Settlers of Catan? It's one of our favorite games, and more often that not my competitive nature gets the best of me...I've been known to throw the robber (a game piece) on more than one occasion! My Dad never let me win at games either - but I knew when I did win, I really had won. I think people let kids win to easy now a days. They dont know how to lose gracefully ...well, not that I know how to do that either ;) I love your new design!

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  2. Love your honesty...
    I'll quit my job & let's get to that happy place together :) k? :)

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  3. I identify with most of these, which is why I love stopping by your blog :) I bet there are a lot of women out there who understand these feelings. If only we could figured out what exactly to do with all of them, huh? Happy Friday, hope you have a great weekend.

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  4. I love this!!! Good work. I love that you were honest and real. And to be honest from my end... a lot of the same things you worry/think about - so do I ! (like getting bigger when your prego - we all have our problem areas and this freaks me out). ANd most everything else is spot on...keep your chin up you have some amazing qualities!

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  5. Hey girl! I'm new to reading you blog but I just wanted to tell you that this spoke SO MUCH to how I feel too! I am such a people pleaser and constantly worried about what others think of me. Thanks for putting your heart out there. It was beautiful to read!
    xo Liz
    www.babygotba.com

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