New Mom Thoughts: The Crazy, Irrational and Normal | Health, Love & Fire

New Mom Thoughts: The Crazy, Irrational and Normal

Wednesday, December 2, 2015

So many things changed the day I had Harper. From the day we told people we were expecting, I had lots of people tell me how different things would be once I had that baby in my arms, and as much as I hate to admit it, they were right. I never thought I'd be the crazy worrying parent about every little thing or that I would be so sad to leave her to go back to work, but I was. The feelings and emotions I experienced after giving birth was something I definitely wasn't prepared for, and honestly it made me feel a little like I was going crazy. Were these feelings and behaviors normal? I was lucky to have several friends who were also new moms that I could text at 3am during a feeding or call when I felt like I was going crazy. But not everyone has that. So at the expense of me sounding like a total crazy person, here are some of the feelings and thoughts I had to help you feel less alone and maybe a little less crazy.
I became overly protective:
I worried about leaving her, who was holding her, who she stays with, the thought of leaving her, everything worried me. But I wasn't just protective of other people watching her, I became protective with my husband too. I wanted him to be around and for him to have as much time with her as I did. It would make me worry if he'd hold her less than me or get frustrated with her getting up in the middle of the night. Basically I worried about all normal things that I shouldn't have been worried about, but I was. And even though I can see now I was being totally crazy, I couldn't tell at the that I was being that way! Thank goodness my husband is patient!

Crying for no reason:
I was on my way home from a doctors appointment just 4 days after Harper was born and crying in the back seat or up in the middle of the night to feed her sitting in the rocker in her room sobbing. I cried a lot. Not because I was depressed or sad, but because the hormones and emotions running through your body are intense. You're lacking sleep, which is probably the biggest culprit to my happy, sad, exhausted emotions. Even if you're baby is a good sleeper, you're only getting a 4 hour stretch at most of sleep before it's time to wake up and change, feed and rock again. Before going to the hospital, I had thought about the fact that it would no longer be just the two of us, but the realization that you're now completely in charge of someone else's life even more so than before is definitely a daunting realization.

I was proud of my body:
I have always struggled with my self-image and feeling embarrassed or ashamed of my body, but for the first time I was comfortable in my own skin. I had just had a baby, was constantly sweating and had that lovely postpartum smell, but I was comfortable and proud. I wasn't overly worried with how I looked, and even though barely anything in my closet fit me right, I felt good. Even now, 3 months later I'm still more comfortable and proud of what my body was able to do than I have ever been before. Sure I have stretch marks on my stomach and an extra pooch that wasn't there before, but I'm okay with that.

I Became Google's Biggest User: 
Anything and everything new that happened or changed I was on my phone googling it. She made this noise, what does that mean? She slept for four hours, do I wake her up? She's eating this often, is this normal? If you can think of a baby related question, I googled it. . . or asked my mom the nurse and she googled it . . . or asked my mom the nurse and we both googled it. No matter how prepared I felt before, once she's home and changing every day there are still questions that come up. And I didn't get to a point where I felt like I didn't wonder about all the changes or behaviors she experienced every day, but I became more confident as the days went by in my ability to make decisions and care for each of those behaviors.

Becoming a mom is truly one of the best things that has ever happened to me, but with that has definitely come a change in my emotions, behavior and feelings. It is a life changing experience and one that I am so thankful to have gone through. Especially because now, I am part of a great group of women, Moms.

What are some of the worries or thoughts you had as a new mom? Did you find any specific tools or places that you went to for answers or encouragement?

16 comments :

  1. Good timing mama! This is just what I needed to read here in my last few days of pregnancy. I already feel like I'm a crazy lady, but this makes me feel more normal! :)

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  2. I don't have kids, but we plan to start trying as soon as we get married. Have two best friends who've recently had babies, this is something that I've worried about. I worry that I'm going to be a crazy person so it's nice to know that I wont be alone ;-)
    Great post!

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  3. This is just perfect! I can relate with you on all fears & emotions. Now I have a toddler, I became less protective of her being with other people like my partner and family.

    I had a strange fear that my daughter was going to be kidnapped in the middle of night when she was a baby. That kept me up for many nights, ugh.

    Thank you for sharing!

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  4. You are normal! I think every new mom has these feelings

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  5. This is perfect! What a great article thank you!

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  6. I'm not a mom yet, but all of these things seem totally normal for a new mommy! I'm sure this will be me one day LOL.

    All the Best,
    Allison | www.LiveLifeWellBlog.com

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  7. So looking forward to being a mom! But I already cry for no reason, I can't imagine how i'd be when I actually have a baby!
    www.fittyfattys.com

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  8. I don't have kids yet but it is already something my best friend is concerned with. It seems like how I will be someday!

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  9. I don't have kids yet, but we will be trying next summer! I'm so excited but scared. Thanks for keeping me informed on whats going to take place.

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  10. Hi Libby,
    It’s been a couple of weeks since we’ve heard from you and wanted to try other communication channels as you did not replay to any of my last emails.
    I would really love to know a time frame for the article you promised at the beginning of this collaboration.
    Madison form Irresistible Me

    ReplyDelete